Prompt: you wrote a book about falling in love with someone you can’t have, what would the last line be?

“Do you believe in alternate universe?” she ask, half laughing to herself for voicing out the idea. “no, do you?” him, ever so understanding of her ramble.

“I thought that…


Perkiraan cuacanya salah,

ternyata hujan lagi.

Padahal kemarin-kemarin sudah cerah,

sudah bisa kesana-kesini tanpa takut becek,

janjian dengan teman tidak perlu terpaksa dibatalkan,

sampai dengan gegabahnya payung dan jas hujan ditaruh sembarangan,

dengan asumsi musim hujannya sudah berakhir.

Ternyata kemarin malam hujan lagi,

belum kunjung berhenti sampai sekarang.

Tidak tahu kapan akan berhenti,

tidak tahu apakah hujannya akan diiringi dengan gemuruh petir,

karena tidak ada yang bisa dipercaya lagi,

perkiraan cuaca sekalipun.

Hanya bisa berharap semoga tidak banjir besar untuk kedua kalinya,

dan matahari segera kembali menyebarkan hangatnya.

April 17, 2021.


Okay before we going.. this is sort of like I wrote this when I remember my birthday is approaching part 2. Okay, here we go.

Gue pernah nemu quote di internet yang bunyinya kira-kira begini “Do you ever wonder how much you exist in other people’s lives? I’m always curious…


Talking to you was like reading my favourite book that I knew very well what was gonna come next.

It was the feeling of familiarity,

the butterflies that tickles between honest words, and warm assurances,

edges that kept me on my seat,

humour that ready to burst every minute,

and the ending chapter that I know, too well.

Just like us; inevitable.

February 7, 2021.

p.s. nope it wasn’t inspired by Thanos. Trust me.


Ica setahun yang lalu mungkin akan kasih judul post ini dengan “I’m Doing This For Me” instead of what I choose now. Gue seegois itu emang, but in my defence, hidup udah kelamaan jahat sama gue juga sih, jadi yaudah biar masih ada semangat gue mau hidup untuk diri sendiri…


Terima kasih atas kebahagiaan yang kamu sebarkan,

mimpi yang menular,

hadirmu yang menenangkan,

dan sosokmu yang membuat langkah sekitarnya lebih ringan.

Terima kasih karena mau ada di saat terlelah,

mendengarkan cerita dari berbagai sudut pandang,

juga tawa yang dibagi,

hingga segala emosi yang terbentuk.

Selamat ulang tahun, terima kasih sudah terlahir.

Semoga waktumu panjang dan jalanmu terang.

Doaku agar kebahagiaan selalu memelukmu.

Okay, so 10th Nov is Dohyon’s birthday, and this piece was supposed to be his birthday letter that dedicated solely for him. But I feel like, it will be better if I write it this way. So let’s just say.. Nam Dohyon is the muse behind this piece, but really, this one is dedicate to all my loved ones. Cheers!


So… gue kirim cv ke kantor gue yang sekarang itu October 2019. Gue masih ingat betul dapat info dari salah satu big account di IG (if you are a fresh graduate you definitely knows), tapi gue baru kirim cv sekitar 2 or 3 hari setelah post itu naik.. I know…


So.. second half of last year was prolly one of the hardest time for me as a person. When life being assho to me, it was mostly due to external factor. But that time, that time was me. I was the problem. Well, the world indeed play its role, but…


Even after all this time, you still standing tall.

Even after all the storm, you know that at the end of the day the sun will always shine for you.

Even when you have thousand reason to cut it off, but you don’t: you want to fight still for your…


Did you ever meant those words?

Did you?

When you said you couldn’t say that thing..

Did you really meant it?

But they said, if someone really loves you, they will try their best.

Did you?

Or, were you just sugar-coating?

I was too naive then, just a dumb girl thinking she finally experience how it feels.

And now that I think about it again, I was indeed naive.

I was never real for you, neither did you.

A stupidly naive person, indeed.

February 17, 2020.

Coping Diary

Humor and writing are on the top list of my coping mechanism, and you probably will encounter many of those here. (IG: @icaryda | TWT: @nisaryda)

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